2 years blogging

Two years of blogging award on WordPress

I discovered today that I’ve been writing this blog for over 2 years and identified as polyamorus for close approaching 3 years. Doesn’t time fly when you’re having fun 😆

So I’d like to say a big thank you to all those who have read my bramblings, liked my posts and especially those who have chosen to commit by hitting the follow link.

I may be getting older but I’m still learning something new every day and this is very important for me. My thoughts, views and feelings on many subjects keep changing and evolving. I believe that being capable of changing by opinion based on experience, evidence and rational thinking helps improve and define me as person.

I still believe in my very basic and simple mantra “Truth, Trust and Honesty”

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Slut…

Dictionary definition of the word slut

I’ve had a tough weekend looking after my kids and this has been topped off by a member of my extended family deciding that it’s okay to describe one of my partners as a “Slut” and then a few other choice words.

Now this word has many meanings for different people, but in this case was used purely as a weapon of attack and derogatory term, deliberately utilised to enforce there feelings of disgust at our life style choice and sow poison seeds of derision and hate.

Continue reading “Slut…”

Recap to Reinforce

Recap to reinforce

Following an intense session of sharing thoughts and emotions people are often feeling vulnerable and raw, so it’s not usually a good time to go back over the same ground immediately.

However once everyone has had some time to relax and settle down, say a day or so.  Its not a bad idea to suggest and hopefully start a  recap relating to the discussion, this can then become a vehicle for summarising the issues and any related actions or resolutions that’s have been agreed to help moving the issue forward.

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Communication Aftercare

Communication aftercare

Talking open and honestly can be tough and painful at times, especially when sharing something that’s really hurting or you’re on the receiving end of some person home truths.

Even if people are using the best communication skills stuff can still really hurt. So when the dust starts to settle looking after all parties in the dialogue is extremely important.

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Being Brave

Being brave or making that leap of faith

The only thing tougher than accepting ownership of our thoughts and feelings, is sharing them with other people. It takes guts to open up and lay yourself vulnerable to others.

It’s also easy to fall into a habit of trying to second guess another person’s reaction to your thoughts, feelings and actions.

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Mind Reading

Mind reading in relationships

Let’s be totally up front and honest about this, the ability to read minds is not a prerequisite for any relationship, however based upon the behaviour exhibited towards others by many people it seems there’s a tendency to assume that it is. Alas mind reading is a bit of a lost art and rarely to be found in us lesser mortals, so we have to approach this need to know about our partners thoughts and feels via communication.

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Listen to hear

Listen to hear, not to respond

Communication is the very life blood and foundation of a good and solid relationship, but it comes in two parts.

  1. Expressing our thought and emotions to others so they can better understand
  2. Listen to what others, so we may better understand them.

It’s sad to say that the latter part is often neglected, because we only listen to respond and often fail to hear or understand.

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Talk, don’t judge

Human behaviour - talk don't judge

When we are in the middle of a heated debate, it’s tough to stay objective, especially when it’s about behaviour and starts to feel like a personal attack.

We all have to accept that unfortunately people are not perfect and that includes us, our partner(s) or partner’s partner(s). We are all by our human definition creatures ruled and driven by our emotions.

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In defense of polyamory

I book marked this piece for a repost many months ago. It struck a deep cord with me, take a look and see what you think…

I would like to make something very clear. Polyamory was not the direct cause of the dissolution of my marriage. It was an indirect cause. It ignited a fire in a relationship that was already fract…

Source: In defense of polyamory