Exploring Polyamory

Many hearts and loves the polyamorus way

The decision to potentially explore Polyamory as a couple, is a very daunting one when it happens. 

However, much of the current research suggests and tends to agree that a couple has a very good chance of being able to make the adjust to nonexclusivity if at least some of the following basic pre-conditions exist:

  • A positive and commonly held view by each partner on the concept of non-monogamy in general
  • A desire by both partners for the existing relationship to remain
  • The existence of a suitably sized reservoir of good will within the relationship
  • A lack or at least minimal level of lingering resentment caused by past hurts and betrayals
  • No polarized view of monogamy/non-monogamy
  • All parties are feeling both powerful and autonomous

The direct discussion of the following issues can also provide help in forming the basis for an open, honest and important initial dialogue:

  • Openness versus secrecy
  • Volition and equality versus coercion and inequality
  • Clarity and specificity of agreements versus confusion/vagueness
  • Honoring agreements versus violating them
  • How each partner views non-monogamy in general

It’s basically about engaging together as a couples in conversation that enables you to decide for yourselves if the concept of sexual exclusivity or nonexclusivity can be defined as functional or dysfunctional for your relationship.

Above all be, honest, open and truthful. Taking one for the team to make it work is never a truly viable option and liable to cause major issues in the future.

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3 thoughts on “Exploring Polyamory

  1. This is one of the best descriptions of “things which must be considered” when it comes to thinking over whether a couple (or one person, for that matter) ought give poly a try. Every one of your points is important, and I can’t emphasize HOW important they are.

    Oh and btw? Should you stumble across this blog and these comments, and think to yourself, “No! This can’t possibly work! This is wrong!,” We are here to inform you that it can and does work!
    Sara Jane, Roy and Ceannt

    Liked by 1 person

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