Triads take lots of work and are basically a time orientated balancing act, they are also considered unpopular within the politically aware poly community in general.
Triads also have an unusually high failure rate (I’ve been there), by any standards, yet there are always a large and steady stream of couples entering into the poly community looking for that mythical special third party to join them.
A quick glance across many of the popular poly sites tends to show a huge percentage of couples actively seeking a pan/bisexual woman (Over 50%). When you consider that less that 10% of most single women would openly identify as pan/bisexual, you can start to see the issue.
If you then take into account that for every single women, irrespective of sexual orientation there will be four to five couples looking the issue of supply and demand becomes most apparent. That’s a rough ratio of 45:1, which is not good odds by any standards unless you happen to win.
So why does this unrealistic expectation persuaded by so many with such persistence?
I blame this phenomena and it popularity firmly on pornography, which paints the perpetual and lasting threesome as the iconic fantasy for many men and bisexual women.
If you then add in the mix the generally high level of female bisexuality acceptance by males compared to the rarely seen female acceptance of male bisexuality, you can begin to see why.
We can also include other factors, such as, “One Penis Policy” (OPP) and “Couple Privilege”. (New posts on these subjects pending)
So lets be clear, a couple stating that they are seeking a unicorn is just like a single woman stating she only wishes to met footballers and a single man claiming he only wishes to marry a super model.On the very surface this may seem reasonable, it may even look like a free and elective choice but it is still objectifying and classifying people by an arbitrary role, rather than who they are or what they seek.
If a couple are not willing to openly examine their relative couple privilege, the unicorns role is unlikely to develop beyond being a plaything.
Once again we find ourselves seeing unicorn hunting as a first step on the road to polyamory. – (See – Unicorn Hunters are a ‘larval form’ of poly)