I’m finding myself in a bit of a funny mood right now and I can’t work out why. There doesn’t appear to be any particular reason for it at the moment, or at least nothing I can really put my finger upon.
Perhaps I’m just a bit down at the moment or just plain tired.
It’s a bit like the sort of feeling that I normally tend to get as the days start grow shorter and the nights draw in, which is odd considering that it’s mid summer at the moment.
I guess it might also be related to the fact that I’m starting to look for a new role, as my current contract is coming to an end. This is the first time that I’ve had to deal with this since moving to a poly lifestyle.
I’m finding myself trying to balance loads of small demands that in total are turning into an extremely heavy load. I suspect it’s just a short term problem driven by such a high level of uncertainty about the future.
I can see a few articles being written in the next few months about the effect of external change upon my relationships. I’m going have to be doing a lot more balancing like this in the future and need to work out how best to manage it.
I always find the time at which I’m looking for a new contract to be stressful, but it tends to generally go quite smoothly. I’d actually like to take a few weeks out this time but I suspect that is unlikely to happen.
All I can ask, is that my partners are supportive and perhaps cut me a little slack until this passes. Knowing that they both love me is a wonderful feeling, even when I’m a bit of a bear with a sore head.