Travelling Companions

“Jealousy vs Envy”

Quite often the two emotions travel together and it’s important to understand which is which and then why it’s occurring so you can then work out how to deal with it.

Here’s a really important question, when you think you feel jealous is the feeling generated purely by the idea that a partner is together with another partner or the thought that you are not providing that happiness your partner feels?

Jealousy is a three-person situation, whereas envy is a two-person situation. Jealousy is often a fear of losing something we have, envy is driven by a need for something we lack and crave.

The most important point is don’t bottle it up or try and take one for the team. Talk about it with your partner(s), tell them how you feel, what you want, need and desire.

Above all avoid anything that sounds like an attack e.g. “you are hurting me” It’s better to say “I feel hurt” and draw them in to the conversation.

You can only really start to feel compersion for your partner(s) and metamour(s) once you start feeling secure in your relationships.

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