Here’s a simple question about polyamory that I’ve often seen asked.
Can cheating occur within a polyamorous relationship?
The very simple and obvious answer is yes it can.
It is probably important to understand and define the term “Cheating”.
act dishonestly or unfairly in order to gain an advantage.“she always cheats at cards”
avoid (something undesirable) by luck or skill.“she cheated death in a spectacular crash”
Within a relationship of any type “Cheating” can be achieved by either lying by commission or omission.
Commission is presentation of information that’s just plainly not true, omission is the intentional or unintentionally non disclosure of information.
I personally have no time for any form of intentional cheating within any of my relationships, because for me polyamory is about being honest and truthful. In turn this builds trust and an act of intentional deceit automatically betrayals that trust.
Unintentional omission is a bit more of a grey area and often fueled by an assumption. Each one of us should be responsible for our own actions and endeavour not to make assumptions that could potentially damage of carefully crafted relationships.
Within polyamory there is no real excuse for any form of deceit or omission, it works through good open communication, all you have to do is ask and discuss your needs, wants and desires.
The following blog post investigates the concept of cheating within a polyamorous relationship and is worth a quick read.
I’d be interested to hear your thoughts and feelings on the subject.